Of Resolutions and Complete Life Changes

Well, like usual I am late on posting this...about 6 days late in writing about resolutions. Oh, I bet you are all excited to read about another person talking about losing weight, quitting smoking, spending less on asparagus, or whatever.

I make a bad joke, but I am a bit serious as well. I mean, maybe it is an American thing, but how many people stick with resolutions and if they do, for how long? I have never been one to really even set a resolution. Although, I do generally think about certain things that I would like to change about myself and my life. To be honest, I generally do that every day. You see, I think that I am committing one of the seven deadly sins on a daily basis. Though, looking around me, I see it happening everywhere so I am not alone. Which one you may ask? Sloth...or better yet known as laziness. Actually, I would like to think that I am not so much lazy as I am just unmotivated at times. I am not sure if there is a difference though. I think there is.

I see laziness as never actually DOING anything, whereas unmotivated is just not WANTING to do anything. The way I see it, unmotivated people actually do things (which I do), just not all the time. There are times when I get focused on something and can just work and work until I am done. However, there are just some days where I feel out of energy and really do not want to do much. Although, when I am just sitting watching TV or something my conscious is loud and active. Though I am not motivated to actually do so, I am mentally kicking myself in the butt for sitting around when there is just so much more to be done.

I think I am at the point where I can actually pinpoint what my problem/s is/are, but I need to get the motivation and perseverance to actually take action on it. I mention perseverance because once I get past the motivation aspect, my perseverance goes kaput. For instance, I started on a cafe motorcycle building project several months ago. I was so excited to get started when I got it that I spent 4 days dismantling the entire bike. Then...nothing...it is still in pieces in my basement just waiting for me to get back to it. For me I tend to get bored and something else usually comes up.

I have a lot going on (FT work, FT school, 3 kids, school activities, sports, coaching, scouts, etc.) and mine and my wife's schedules are weird too - I am scheduled to work from 8-5 and she works from 6p-3a, needless to say that is grueling. The good news is that we both work from home; however, the bad news is that we both work from home. Huh? The reason working from home is bad is because it is hard to separate work from home. I get distracted with home things sometimes when working and vice versa. I also have a bad habit of getting on my wife's schedule. When I am doing schoolwork, I generally do not get in bed until like 1:00 Am most nights. However, since my wife has started working until 3:00, I have not been going to bed until 3:00. I then have to get up at 7:00 to get the kids ready for school. Needless to say, I am tired!

Another reason I am sure I am unmotivated is because I a.) smoke (15 years) and b.) do not exercise. Actually that is an understatement. I work sitting down and have a lot of school work so I am sitting down then as well. Luckily I have not gained any weight or anything (who has time to eat with that schedule?) I hate it! I really want to stop both of those - meaning stop smoking and start exercising. I keep lying to myself and say that I do not have time to do so. This has been going on 2 years saying that now. The honest thing is that I do not have time NOT to.

I am also a HORRIBLE planner. Hate is a strong word and I rarely use it, but I HATE planning. I will admit though that when I do have a plan, schedule (and STICK-TO-IT) I usually get a lot more done. Hmm, imagine that! Usually I justify not planning by stating I am not good at it, so it takes me too long to do it, which is taking away time I am actually doing it! (I seriously think that I have Adult ADD or something!).

So, what is my point? I am not sure - I hadn't planned on having a point. But I suppose it is to say that I do not believe in New Year's resolutions. They do not work in my opinion. They are just created to be broken - and broken quickly. However, I do have goals for myself that it just so happens that I thought of right around the New Year. I refuse to call them New Year's resolutions because I do not want to break them. I need to get on a schedule with as much stuff as I have going on. I need to plan ahead and really want to stop smoking and exercise more. We shall see what the future holds. I have a whole lot more things that I want to do as well. So it is sort of a resolution package, if you will. I want to spend more time with my family, take my kids to do at least one fun thing once a week, take an actual family vacation this year, remodel and improve the house, among others. I reckon if I have a whole bunch of goals, I will meet at least one - hopefully. Quantity equals quality!